Support for adults

This section details the different types of support available, for adults, here at Tony’s Place.

WAVES programme (Wellington)

WAVES is an 8-week psycho-educational programme.

Groups, usually of 6-10 people, meet weekly to cover a range of specific topics, including grief reactions and different grief styles, understanding suicide, how the suicide has impacted on your social network, and ways to remember your loved one.

The programme is based on what research tells us is most effective in helping those affected by suicide. The sessions involve a mix of education (the facilitators sharing information) and participants sharing their own experiences, including what has helped them. In this way, the group learn from and support each other.

The programme combines learning about suicide and bereavement, with group discussion and support. The group is facilitated by two trained facilitators over eight weeks and supports members to:

  • meet and share with others who are also experiencing the impact of suicide

  • explore aspects of their grief and reduce isolation and stigma associated with bereavement by suicide in a safe and supportive environment

  • get information and strategies about how to care for themselves and others (including children and young people), after a suicide

  • adjust to living with loss and moving forward.

Our next WAVES group in Wellington begins 19 August

Contact us now to find out more or register your interest.

Session 1: Introduction

  • Getting to know each other

  • Negotiating the process

  • Building trust and rapport

  • Establishing values and safety

Session 2: Acknowledging the grief and loss

  • Acknowledging and sharing aspects of grief

  • Learning more about the grief process and different styles of grieving

  • Learning about and sharing strategies for managing grief

Session 3: Emotional responses and coping

  • Identifying, acknowledging and sharing emotions (i.e. anger, sadness, fear, guilt)

  • Learning more about managing strong emotions

  • Learning about and sharing health ways to express and manage emotions

Session 4: Cognitive responses, living with why and coping

  • Identifying, acknowledging and sharing recurring thoughts (e.g. why???)

  • Learning more about making sense of suicide and managing unhelpful thoughts

  • Learning about and sharing healthy ways to express thoughts and manage thinking

Session 5: Social responses, impact and support

  • Identifying, acknowledging and sharing how suicide has affected people and their family/whānau socially

  • Learning more about the social impact of suicide, stigma and supporting others

  • Learning more about and sharing ways to strengthen, repair and build new relationships

Session 6: Healing, remembering rituals and connections

  • Identifying and sharing how people accommodate grief, adjust to loss and have begun to heal

  • Learning more about rituals, ways of letting go of pain and holding on to memories and connections with loved ones.

  • Sharing stories about loved ones and how people want to remember them

Session 7: Looking ahead, moving forward

  • Identifying, acknowledging and sharing how grief and loss changes over time

  • Learning more about stories of suffering, growth, and survivorship

  • Learning more about and sharing ways people can stay hopeful and resilient going forward

Session 8: Closure, reflection and feedback

  • Bring the group to a close, reflecting on experiences with others

  • Collecting feedback to help the development of Waves

  • Collecting a message of hope for other survivors

Session overview


Topic Connect sessions (Wellington)

Tony’s Place hosts regular Topic Connect sessions. These are an informal opportunity for adults affected by suicide to come along, hear a speaker on the evening’s given topic and share in conversation with others who ‘get it’. Sessions tend to run 7-9pm. Please contact us to register your interest and receive venue details.

A small koha is appreciated to help cover supper costs.

If there’s a particular topic you’d like us to consider, please let us know.

Upcoming Topic Connect sessions

Coping with Guilt

Supporting Grieving Children

Navigating the Christmas Period

Tuesday 13 May 2025

Tuesday 12 August 2025

Tuesday 11 November 2025

Click on the image to download.


Free downloadable resource

Other free supports available for adults nationwide

This sections details other support options available, in addition to those provided by Tony’s Place. For more information on these, please contact the providers directly. You do not need a referral to access these services, you can self-refer.

Free therapeutic support specifically for individuals (of all ages) and families bereaved by suicide. Up to 10 free sessions are available face-to-face, online or by phone – www.aoaketera.org.nz or leave a message on 0800 000 053.

Aoake Te Rā - Counselling

Free, nationwide support for people after a suicide. Be supported by a Support Worker.

Also be aware that the Victim Support website contains a number of suicide-specific resources (these are highly recommended and contain a lot of useful, practical information).

www.victimsupport.org.nz

Phone 0800 842 846

Victim Support Manaaki Tāngata

WAVES is an 8-week grief educational programme for adults (18 years +) who have been affected by the suicide of someone they know. While Tony’s Place runs WAVES in the Wellington area, visit here to find out if WAVES is available in your local area.

WAVES programme

There are a number of peer support groups that meet regularly around the country. Most of these groups have been established and are facilitated by people who are suicide-bereaved themselves. Peer support group meetings typically provide the opportunity for those affected by suicide to come together over a cup of tea/coffee and seek support from one another.

If you live in the Wellington area, the Wellington Suicide-loss Support Group meets on the 2nd Wednesday of each month at the Newlands Community Centre. Contact Nerys on 027 340 8579.

Visit here for a nationwide listing of suicide-loss peer support groups to see if there is one in your local area.

Suicide-loss Peer Support Groups


Helplines

Free text of call 1737 anytime (24/7) to speak to a trained counsellor or a peer support person

www.1737.org.nz

Need to talk? 1737

Lifeline

Free telephone counselling 24/7 - phone 0800 543 354